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а вот еще радостн и любимого
Inexpert and Unexpected Things
And Harry laughs, in spite of himself, in spite of the war and the Horcruxes and all the things to come.


Across the room, Ginny rolls her eyes at him, which makes him feel slightly cheered.


He says, 'Malfoy's going to be staying here for a little while, Ron.'
But it is not Ron who reacts first; he is too busy recovering from the shock. Hermione is the one who, before Harry can even pull out his wand in self-defense, has both Harry and Malfoy slammed against the wall, iron bands circling their wrists, with one shouted spell. Harry feels as if he's just been hit by two Bludgers at once, and even Ron looks taken aback by Hermione's reaction.


'We'll wait at least an hour, in case it's Polyjuice Potion.' … Ron sees the expression on Harry's face and says tentatively, 'Herm, isn't an hour a – sort of a long time-'….
'Yeah, no doubt,' Ron says, fixing Harry with a look that manages to convey both his sympathy and suspicion, …………
'Some friends you have, Potter,'…Harry sighs, looking away from Malfoy. He doesn't bother struggling. He knows Hermione too well for that.


It's when she gets to the point of demanding, 'what was the first Gryffindor password in second year?' that Ron rolls his eyes. 'Come on, Hermione, I don't remember that,' he mutters. 'It's Harry, okay?


Ron is eyeing Malfoy with distaste, and he says warily, 'Harry, you aren't Dumbledore.'


For his part, Ron mutters, 'Well, don't expect me to share a room with him. Or to be nice to him….' 'Same to you, Weasley,' Malfoy says with venom, at the same time that Harry says, 'I know, Ron … I'll stay with Malfoy to keep an eye on him.'
'Fantastic,' Ron and Malfoy mutter in unison. They glare at each other.


'No, I'm not bloody afraid of you,' Ron shouts. 'Hermione, back me up here-'

Hi there, Harry,' Fred says cheerfully. 'Nothing like being accused of a stolen identity to make a chap feel welcome, eh?...........

Now, however, the nature of 12 Grimmauld Place is a bit funnier when its target is someone else.
In the first week, Malfoy runs into a suit of armor – 'I swear it moved!' he yelps, when Harry finds him trapped beneath it – has two windows slam without warning on his fingers, and gets into a wrestling match with a wardrobe that tries to shut him inside. To make matters worse, Ron amuses himself by agitating the bats until they fly at Malfoy head. Once they chase him out of the bath, clutching several towels around him and screaming. Harry and Ron laugh so hard they almost choke.

But to Harry's dismay, Malfoy decides that Harry is the most likely ally of the three of them and promptly attaches himself. He takes to following Harry around 12 Grimmauld Place, complaining from everything about rust in the water to the size of Ron's ears………….

'and Ron does not have parasites!'
'What do you call Granger, then?' sniggers Malfoy.


'I don't even hate him anymore,' Harry hisses to Ron in the kitchen that evening, as Hermione is finishing dinner, 'I just want him to shut up-'
'spit in his food,' Ron suggests brightly.
'Well, that's hygienic,' Hermione says, with a hint of disapproval, but Harry has already done it. Ron snickers.

In the next three days, Malfoy leaves spiders in Ron's bed, hexes Harry's sheets so they glue themselves together once he's between them, and talks loudly every chance he gets about the lice he's seen in Hermione's hair. 'I have not got lice,' Hermione says crossly, and channels her fury into knitting, producing four hats in one night.

It comes to a head one Sunday afternoon when Ron is standing at the kitchen counter, trying to get Malfoy to eat a Canary Cream. 'They're really delicious,' he enthuses, shoving it at Malfoy, who stares at it as if it might be poisonous.
'I wouldn't eat that,' Hermione warns as she passes through the room with a pile of books under one arm and Crookshanks under the other. 'it's from Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, it'll turn you into a canary.'
'Oh, have you got a crash on me; Mudblood?' Malfoy says at once. Crookshanks hisses at him, and he narrows his eyes. 'I wouldn't touch you if you paid me, you realize.'
'She wouldn't touch you if you were the last person on Earth!' Ron retorts hotly, and before anyone can stop him, he yanks Malfoy towards him with a fistful of his shirt and tries to shove the Canary Cream into his mouth. Malfoy, teeth clamped shut, elbows Ron viciously in the ribs to get Ron's fist out of his face, but Ron's hand is still doggedly gripping Malfoy by the shirt. Malfoy howls, 'Get off me, you fucking oaf!' Ron, encouraged by this, smears the Canary Creamin Malfoy's hair..
'Pertificus totalus,' snaps Hermione, whom both of them seem to have forgot about. …. Which is how Harry finds them a second later when he wanders downstairs for a snack, then takes a step back at the look on Hermione's face.

'But I only have it in me to be nice to Malfoy or to suffer through these stupid books. I can't possibly do both. It'd kill me.'


'Hermione's making breakfast,' Harry says.
Malfoy lifts his upper lip. 'Well, I certainly don't want her filth in my breakfast-'
'Perfect,' Hermione interrupts. 'It's about time you start helping with meals. We all take turns. You can have Thursdays-'
'Hermione, no!' Ron groans, wandering into the kitchen just in time to hear her. 'he'll poison us!'
'It can't be any worse than your dinners, I'm sure,' Hermione says mildly. In his seat, Harry quickly turns his snicker into a cough as Ron sends him a glare. Once, Ron had made a meal of tea and hard boiled eggs, the only two things he was certain would turn out right. In fact, Ron made so many eggs that they were eating the remnants for three days. Even now, Hermione turns a bit green at the mention.
'Excuse me, I don't cook,' Malfoy says, as if cook is a dirty word…..'…I ought to make you cook for Dobby and iron your hands when you flummox it up! Bang your head against the wall a few dozen times, then see how good you think you are!' then, breathing hard, Hermione seems to remember her resolve to be nice to Malfoy. She says quickly,'….it's a bit like Potions, and you're – you're good at that.'
Malfoy looks taken aback.
'S.P.E.W.,' Harry shrugs by way of explanation. Ron mimes spewing vomit behind Hermione's back.

'Potter,' he says. 'Make me a sandwich.'
'Make you – no!' Harry exclaims. 'Get your own sandwich!'
'See?' Ron says, pointing at Malfoy but staring at Hermione.
'Stop pointing at me,' Malfoy whines, and stomps back out of the kitchen.


'She looked a bloody lot like Madam Pince, too, Ron adds. 'You know, shrieking about the sanctity of knowledge and depraved schoolchildren.' He does a very accurate imitation of Madam Pince swooping down on them, flailing her batty arms, and imagining Hermione doing the very same, Harry can't help but laugh.


'I'm tired,' Harry says, 'and I don't want to deal with Rufus Scrimgeour any more, and I don't want to go to Azkaban tomorrow, and I don't want to ever see your father's smug, slimy face again without being able to hex him, and I really don't want to keep seeing you every single day at breakfast, but I'm doing all of these thing, all right? I'm doing them because you are going to co-operate, and you are going to help me,and you are even going to be nice sometimes, and-'Harry scowls at Ron, who is apologetically mouthing something about Hermione,'-and, and fine, if you are, we'll throw in a cake.'
'You'll what? .. Wait, Potter, why are you going to Azkaban tomorrow?'
'To see your Father,….
Malfoy's eyes have a strange light to them….He says doggedly, 'I want to come. To Azkaban. I want to come.'


'yes, I'm sure,' Malfoy snaps. 'I read every book I could find about Azkaban last summer.'



'Potter!' Malfoy squeaks. 'What are you doing?'
'Sharing body heat,' he says, and tries not to snicker at how scandalized Malfoy sounds.
'I think it's actually called unwanted sexual attention-'
'Shut up,' Harry says tolerantly. 'Do you want to freeze to death before you see your father?'
'You mean, before you see my father,' Malfoy snipes, but after a moment, his arm creeps around Harry. Immediately, Harry thinks of what Ron would say, finding the two of them spooned together under a heap of blankets, and starts shaking with silent laughter.



Even as Harry watches, the goat tattoo lifts its head , then suddenly goes galloping around Aberforth's wrist and paws a bit with its front hoof. 'Blimey,' Harry hears Ron whisper behind him. 'I want one of these!'
'A goat?' Hermione says incredulously.
'No, a magical tattoo!


Near the food, Fleur's family has positioned a small, self-playing orchestra, complete with a cello that twirls charmingly between songs.
But in the back of the house, Harry can hear that Charlie and several of his friends are playing their own music, which promises a bit more fun…..but at that moment, Gabrielle Delacour bounds past him, shrieking, 'It's the Mermen, I love them,' and pumping her fist in the air. Somehow, in the last ten minutes, she has changed out of her bridesmaid dress and into what look like black leather pants.
'She's eleven years old!' Hermione hisses in his ear, sounding scandalized

The moment after his fingers close around the fluttering little ball, Malfoy slams into him, shouting, 'Fucking school brooms, this hasn't got any fucking brakes-' He's warm from the sun and his knees are sharp against Harry's thigh when his arms wrap around Harry for balance, and Harry laughs' in spite of himself, in spite of the war and the Horcruxes and all the things to come.
'Oh, shut up,' Malfoy snaps, hair in his face, off-balance. His arms are still around Harry. He holds on a little too long, and Harry lets him.